Yo! Yo! Yo!

Hi!

I've been gone for awhile!
Trevor has been a sick pup and I've been exhausted from long days at the hospital. I have more to say but no time to type at the moment...so just hang in there. I promise to be back tomorrow with something interesting to say.

XOXO
K

Stop the Bullshit

I'm sitting home, watching the snow fall...AGAIN, and relaxing by a warm fire in the fireplace, on a day off from nursing (the BEST job in the world BTW), reading blogs. Through my WWW exploration today I found the You Tube clip below of Anne Hathaway excepting and award from the Human Rights Campaign for her support of the LGBT community. It moved me so much because I have a very dear and best friend, Meg, who is a lesbian. She is in a loving relationship with a cute little potter. I used to always talk about planning their vegan hippie mountain top wedding..and say when you get married this and when you get married that, until one day Meg said, "Kristin, we CAN'T get married". And I just rambled on, "Oh, that whole no gay marriage thing? That's so stupid, don't listen to them. You can get married, it's just a piece of paper. Don't be silly". After saying that I looked up and saw her face...and then realized the seriousness of what she had said...she can not, BY LAW, marry the one person in this world who she would give anything to marry. She is not allowed to do that. It's so easy for me to say it's just a piece of paper, because I am, in the eyes of our government, more civilized in my heterosexual relationship than she is. Over the years she has told me how people will look at her and her girlfriend when they hold hands in public...how she has been treated as a gay woman. It makes me SICK to think of some asshole passing judgment on her...thinking she is less of a human being than they are. I could go on and on...

I have a Lesbian Best Friend. She is kind, loving, hyper-intelligent, in love, revolutionary, inspirational, strong, hysterical, and amazing. She deserves the same amount of respect that you do. Treat her as you would want to be treated. Embrace her as a fellow human being.
Let's stop the bullshit.

Wild Geese

Today's yoga class kicked my butt. It was worth it in the end because my body was thankful for the stretching, flexing, and centering....and because my yoga instructor shared this poem with us.

Wild Geese
by Mary Oliver

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting —
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.


This was just what I needed today....this poem. I do not have to be good. I do not have to walk on my knees through the desert repenting. I can live my life and be the best I can be...whether or not it is the best to you...or good to you...is not something to be worried about. I will live my life as it fulfills me and fit into this world as I am meant to.

Diet Update

Below you will find a comment I posted on Swistle's Blog in response to her latest entry regarding buttery & delicious pecan rolls made for her by her mother:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
I am running in circles ripping my hair out as my "diet" has gone south in the last few weeks and what clothing used to be loose is now tight again and all I want to do is eat and now there are delicious pecan rolls sent straight from the devil himself to taunt me.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Sigh.
I am really having a rough time staying on the wagon these last 3 weeks. First: I ate because I was stressed about my boards. Second: I ate because I was nervous about what the results of my boards would be. Third: I ate because I was celebrating the passing of my boards. Now: I am stuck in the cycle of bad eating habits. I was JUST getting to the point where I wasn't having night sweats and withdrawal symptoms from my sugar cutbacks. DAMN IT! The positive: I continue with yoga 4-5 times per week and get at least one day of cardio in. I hope to increase my cardio..but I am also starting a wild and crazy new work schedule so, I'll give myself some time to adjust.

So there you go. An update. Painfully & obviously absent? A weigh in. Don't expect one until the Monday, March 24th. So there. Hmmph.

Small People AMAZE ME

Meet my pseudo-nephew, Theo. I sometimes call him "Pseudopoops" inspired by the blog Pseudostoops...a friend of Sam's. Isn't he cute??!! I spent yesterday over at their house asissting with various chores: laundry, recycling disposal, lunch fetching, etc. But mostly marveling at the craziness that is my best friend as a MOTHER. WOW. She seriously has me in awe. I can't stop thinking about how Sam and Bryan have CREATED this amazing little person...that Sam has BIRTHED this child...and that he will GROW and SPEAK. The fact that my best friend from childhood is now a mother is so mind blowing...I can't even put the emotions into words. All I can say is, Sam, you are my idol. I am so proud of you. You are an amazing and beautiful woman. You create FOOD for your child with your BODY and I don't even know what to say about it all, except I love you!

My favorite*new* computer word

BAH. This is my favorite new computer word. I say new beause I am new to this whole "expressing your emotions through a keyboard and monitor" concept. I am a very "animated" communicator in *real* life.

So anyhow, bah. I think it expresses so much.

BAH! bah. BAH.

This is how I am feeling right now....which is striz-ange because I am now a FRIGGIN REGISTERED NURSE..the VERY THING I HAVE BEEN BUSTING MY ASS TO BECOME FOR THE LAST JILLION YEARS and I had an evening of yoga (new to me since my schedule has change...'cause I'm a NURSE)....a very nice evening of yoga by candle light. And, my best friend gave birth to a BEAUTIFUL, HEALTHY baby boy...who loves me (he told me I'm his favorite auntie while holding my finger with his 23hr old mini-hand) and all in all life is great.

You know, I think we need a vacation. Trevor has had a stressful few months of work and we all know how things have been for me. The bummer part is that I started my new job as an RN on Tuesday (clarification-NOT the bummer part) and I have 12 weeeks of full time training...so we can't go to our parents home on Sanibel Island like we normally do each spring...I think we'll need to make do with a weekend getaway for the time being so that we don't beat each other to death during a fit of cabin fever.

Any ideas for the Wisconsin, Illinois, Indiana region?
Our mental health is at stake here.

Weigh In - Week 5

STARTING WEIGHT: 186.9

Current Weight: 183
Pounds lost this week: 0 lb
Pounds to Goal Weight (150): 33.1
Total Weight Loss: 3.9 lbs ( still 12 ish sticks of butter)

THIS IS NO JOKE!
After 2 weeks of ridiculous eating habits....my weight has stayed THE SAME! HALLELUJAH!!! This next week, I am going to rock it out. It's going to be weight loss city around this joint. Stay Tuned!

On an even more exciting note- my very best friend in the whole wide world Samantha Jo Campen of this blog just gave birth the her new little boy last night at 8:03pm. It's she and her husbands first child, Theo. I am so proud of her...she is such a strong woman and has gone through a lot this last month with pre-term labor issues, but now all is well and I am going to get to meet him today after work! Yeah!